Saturday, June 16, 2012

Filling Me Up

For an introvert like I am, solitude is what "fills my well," and boosts me up when I feel stressed out.  When I have been in overwhelming life situations what my heart cries out to do is to go lose myself in a bookstore or library or hike for a few hours and hear the thoughts in my head.

It is kind of tough to do that now that I am a mom to four.  There are six people in our home, pure and simple.  As a kid I would escape to the quiet of my own bedroom to rejuvenate.  As we've moved and remodeled and remodeled and moved over the last few years "MY" room at any given time also functions to house other people, or at the least...other life functions like studying, exercise, baby changing, etc.

In order to be my best me, I  need to fit a few of those solitary hours into my week on an ongoing basis. With my personality it is just a need.  For the regular extrovert, I don't think it always makes sense.  When I am facing struggles, often a friend will suggest we spend an hour on the phone or we go out to a movie or something.  They mean well, but social interactions often raise my stress level another notch.  When it comes to my relationships with others I do much better on a side to side basis--accompanying one another in a normal life process such as watching our kids at the playground, working together on a charity project, or my favorite:  Exercising Together.  Some of the happiest and most fulfilling hours of my life in the last 5 years were spend briskly walking with my neighbors.  One of my goals this year is to find a way to duplicate that exercise plus excuse to socialize time into my days again.

I'm considering doing this by way of joining a gym (with childcare) and taking group fitness classes.  Do any of you have ideas of other ways to do this?  Or a way to combine other multiple life helps?


  1. Walking is definitely a good idea. I personally love getting out into the fresh air and walking with a friend, child, or my husband. I also exercise at a gym each morning and that makes a world of difference in my life!

  2. I can TOTALLY relate to this-I'm an introvert and with three young boys I'm in dire need of some quiet time. Last year my husband was deployed so I got that after my boys were in bed for the night but not anymore (not that I'm complaining that he's home!) I've been thinking about joining a gym with childcare too, it's really the best way for me to have some quiet "me" time.

  3. I miss walking with you Bobi. I'm hoping to find some people to do that with again. I don't have any suggestions, but it seems that other than joining a gym, the only way to get some alone time is to get up early. Ugh!

  4. Bobi! Oh how I miss those walks through the VG. Remember when we saw that skunk by one of the buildings? I totally thought we were gonna get sprayed:)
    I feel your pain with the alone time. With children who wake up at 5:45, it is impossible to get any start on the day alone, unless I want to be even more grumpy from waking up earlier!
    I joined a gym here for a year, and it was really nice to drop the kids off and work off my stress. It all comes down to making it a priority to find time for yourself. I can definitely tell when I have not been focusing enough on me because I am a BEAR to live with!

  5. I'm an introvert, too, who also happens to be a Bible teacher/Speaker.
    I've found that when I am in a group I'm best if I have a purpose. That's why public speaking is fun and fulfilling for me - purpose.
    I also like to do real things w/friends in stead of going for coffee, etc.
    I meet weekly w/2 friends (separate days) and we run together. I'd rather run/walk & talk with a friend or even with an acquaintance type friend. If lunch or coffee is suggested, I suggest a walk in the park (or a run if the other party is a runner, too).


Thanks for your comments~!