Sunday, November 25, 2012
I just got done watching some of this woman's TED talks and thinking about courage and vulnerability. I, as do probably a lot of others, feel like the poster child of hiding from things due to fear of being vulnerable. I've been job hunting for about a year now, and learning a lot about myself in the process of rejection. I haven't seen really any financial success to speak of but I've felt the thrill of being rewarded for my own creation and creativity via this blog. It's something I wanted to really say I tried this year and that is why I have posted almost every day since Jan 1. I figure good, bad, ugly or boring I'm gonna post what I have to post, because if I don't I won't have ever really tried this thing.
My top sources of vulnerabily as a blogger are this:
1. Picture quality, blog layout, blog provider, cool sounding URL, amount of times a project is pinned, number or lack of comments.
2. Saying my truth rather than saying something catchy that I think people want to read
After watching the thought provoking talks by Brene I think if I'm really going to DO THIS the way I want to I'm going to have to let those fears go and keep doing it my way. Trying to make something I think people want wears me out, but tapping into my own creativity is re-generating. I feel so much pressure to have the time I spend show some kind of financial gain for our family and that's probably the biggest thing that keeps me from pursuing what I find invigorating mentally. But a year later, with nothing to show from pursuing the *normal* way of making a living, why the heck not?! Working for free better be fun work!