No OCD

So, I decided to see out a second opinion on my Crazy.  It wasn't so much that I sought out a second opinion, but more that I kept an appointment it took me three months to get into, while being treated by my second choice in the meantime.

So after the long long wait to get into this new Dr. (a woman this time), I think I see why the wait was so long.  She was SO helpful, and SO thorough.  She started from the very beginning (of my life) and assessed all of my crazy and not-so-crazy and actually quite functional stages :) to piece together what we were dealing with.  It turns out that crappy years (where you are homeless, get sued, lose friends, get manipulated financially by friends, move several times, kids have surgeries or major illnesses...can sometimes result in temporary (but SERIOUS) Crazy all its own.

She does not think I have a lifelong disorder such as OCD based on my past stages of life as well as the current ways I am functioning.  It actually makes more sense.  And when I explained it to my kids, my super-smart 9 year old daughter said, "That's good!  Now you don't need to take 6 showers a day!"  Note:  I was never doing any compulsions like that, but she read one of the books I had checked out from the library about the disorder....

So, anyway, its just plain ol' depression.  I need some intense treatment, and the depth of how bad it has gotten has morphed me in to a habit of regular panic episodes.  However, there are more treatment options (like it isn't Prozac or nothing), but much will stay the same.  She has started me on a different drug but it will take weeks to know what to do next.